"They don't want to talk to anyone else," marriage therapist Kimberly Hershenson told Bustle. Some guys may ask you what youre doing tonight just to feel out what kind of stuff you like to do in your free time. 2) To see if he can join you in your plans A guy might ask you what your plans Your best bet is to wait at least five minutes. 2. A good sign that someone is genuinely interested in you is the amount of focus and attention they give you and your thoughts. Often, when ministry is hard, we lose perspective, and we need people to help us correct our perspective. Before immediately telling him that you are busy, analyze the situation. He wants to get together with you. Then it's pretty obvious he wants to do something but you're busy. Instead of trying to figure out if youre into him, hell go for the easy way out by asking you what youre up to before making his move. He will get thoughtful gifts for you without any occasion. He will want to keep up with everything thats going on in your life. For some people, they wont introduce you because there's multiple others that they might be dating and generally parents dont approve of that. If youre meeting the fam, you know this person sees long-term potential with you. The defendant told her his fists were his secret weapon. Another reason why he might be asking you what youre doing is that he doesnt know how to approach people. Just because you might see him as a jerk, that doesnt mean hes a jerk. Hes Looking for A Hookup. He will know how you like your coffee, your favorite movie, your favorite book, and even about that dress you have been wanting to get. Its always nice to get to know someone, and talking about what youre doing is a great way to do that. Say something along the lines that you are not doing anything right now, ask him how he is, and maybe respond with WBU too. Theres a new theory in the relationship world thats causing quite a stir its called the hero instinct. Dear Amy: My parents are wonderful people. Maybe you have ignored him in real life because you didnt like him or because you dont even know him or dont have anything in common with him. He might be just trying to be polite, but if his question is coming off as a bit too nice like hes a bit too sensitive, it might be a red flag. Do you even know who is texting you? If you still like him, then it might be worth giving it a go and seeing where things go. Limiting the number of "Instance on Points" in the Viewport. A few months ago, I reached out to Relationship Hero when I was going through a tough patch in my relationship. If you show him that youre interested in talking to him, hell likely open up and show his true personality. And more than anything, remember that its never the wrong time to take a break from someone or cut it off if youre not into them anymore. It can be a little awkward sometimes, but its still an innocent question. Learn more about Stack Overflow the company, and our products. Youll reach a part of him that no woman has ever managed to reach before. Creating a distraction can be an easy way to avoid an awkward question at a family event. YouGov. Ask Amy: I want to keep my parents creepy friend from harassing my daughter. What To Do When Your Exs New Girlfriend Overstepping Boundaries? Even if you share a very deep bond with someone, it is not necessary that you will share your interest with them. Be honest with him and let him know how you feel. Okay, so lets not take an hour to respond on purpose. This way, your answer will determine the course of the conversation and his/her interest level as well. He may not speak to you during every moment of the day, but he likes Like me on Facebook to see more articles like this in your feed. If you have to wait, this is okay. When he tries to open up with you, it indicates that he shares a special bond with you. Instead of going for a big risk and asking you out, hell instead first try to make a connection with you by asking about what youre doing. You can even be blunt and tell him that you havent been feeling good because hes been asking about your plans every day. The Love Desk. Just ignore it completely and pay attention to the conversation. Can the game be left in an invalid state if all state-based actions are replaced? The dating world is stressful. Hearst Magazine Media, Inc. All Rights Reserved. What to do when a guy keeps asking what you are doing? Maybe he's just being a nice guy, sure. Did a guy ask you about your plans tonight? In the end, if youve tried all these ways of responding to a guy who keeps asking what youre doing, and he still doesnt get the hint, then it might be time to take a break from him. watch this simple and genuine video by James Bauer, Heres a link to the excellent video again. A person who is into you will take you to a place where they can hear you speak without interruption, such as a caf or the park for a picnic, because they value you for your mind and what you have to say. WebHaha your friend makes me laugh She's right, that is a good way to flirt with him. Simply put, a person who is into you will want to make a good impression and do little things to impress you when you're around. How is white allowed to castle 0-0-0 in this position? But remember, men are simple creatures and when theyre bored, theyll be more likely to ask girls out because it gives them something to do. He's hedging his bets here. I told him I am in the zone please don't bother me. Men have certain innate drivers. but he will do whatever it takes to stay connected. Another way to respond is to play hard to get and act like youre not interested in being nice to him. The easiest thing to do is to watch this simple and genuine video by James Bauer. When he touches your back or just your shoulder, for example, it might be to see if youll give him a similar signal. Just two friends going to a wedding. People really need to stop jumping into conclusions. You wanna come with? Should I care about the coworker next to me while he dozes off and our boss doesn't care? 2021. Rather than asking you for a date, he might want to go for the well see where it goes route. Connect and share knowledge within a single location that is structured and easy to search. All of these examples show that under the right circumstance, you can still be kind and helpful even if your intentions arent that clear. By the time I am concentrated again it's about 10 minutes lost every hour. Dont get too ahead of yourself and assume that the guy is just trying to figure out a way to get his hands on your body. But when a guy asks what your doing, all you have to do is tell him. Just make sure that you do yourself a favor and arent going to regret it later. rev2023.4.21.43403. If you respond positively in a conversation, it will likely will continue. When he is 100% invested in you, he will do things that will leave a positive and lasting impression on you. You are not sure of his intentions yet which is why you have to find out. Stating the obvious here, don't panic especially so much that it might get your fingers to smash the keyboard and accidentally send something to your crush that you didn't He might be busy arent we all? 14 subtle signs someone is from a wealthy family, 24 surprising ways to tell if your married boss likes you romantically. Men who are interested keep it going and eventually direct the convo into an in-person meeting. Okay, a guy who texts you WYD translates to wanting to hook up with you. Well, Im sure your mind is racing with what hes implying. Things you can do when a guy is being indirect about asking you out 1) Ask him what the real deal is Reading between the lines and assuming things can be He just does it subconsciously because he likes you. "In today's society, where being present in a conversation is one of the hardest things to do, giving a new person full attention during [a conversation] is one of the highest compliments," Schmitz said. For those of you in full-time ministry, remember the first time you thought to yourself, imagine if I could spend the rest of my life focusing on doing this.. Let him know that youre also feeling a bit insecure about the relationship and ask him to be clear about what he wants from the two of you. If they ask about your frustrating boss at work, ask them how their own job is going. On the one hand, if you're not into them, it helps your cute coworker avoid the awkwardness of potential rejection. Just respond with, hi, not much, how is everything with you?, Relationships are never easy. In 2022, women earned an average of 82% of what men earned, according to a new Pew Research Center analysis of median hourly earnings of both full- and part-time workers. He doesnt initiate any physical contact with you. I work with our community partners a lot, and our director, Fergus, likes to ask me to ask them for things without telling me they already said no. 11 Big Reasons Why Its Time To say I am Done. And because you have not talked in a while so its nice to reach out to an old friend. So instead of being brave and asking you out, hell try his luck by first asking about what youre up to. Anytime a guy has to clarify with "it's not a date" or "I hope this doesn't come off the wrong way," it's because he's into you. That doesnt mean this guy doesnt want to take you out, by the way! It's almost not even vibes anymore. He might be trying to have a conversation with someone because hes bored and doesnt have anything better to do. If he says that, he's basically asking you on a date, but if you seem uneasy, he can always back peddle. It doesnt mean hell call or text you every hour of the day though that may happen too! WebIf he asks then he is a control freak. If he repeatedly asks about what youre doing, he might be trying to figure out if you are interested. If you feel that you need advice on how to respond, its okay to get advice from your friends. Its possible that a guy is asking you what your plans are to make sure you dont have a boyfriend or significant other. If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach. If you find that these are the only places someone ever takes you, ask yourself what their intentions are. We sometimes include products we think are useful for our readers. It shows that they are paying attention and really trying to get to know you, as well as wanting to get to know more about you, Safran says. Youll notice that he patiently and interestingly listens to everything you say. If youre only getting back the occasional lol, yeah, or k, its probably time to move on. I would definitely say to people who are interested in someone, especially in this day and age, it's not so hard to check in on somebody via text or whatever, Safran says. If they are interested, they will take the necessary steps to see you again.. If he's still there after 5 minutes, ask him if he hasn't got a desk of his own to work from, then start another phone call. No matter how much youd like to see him again, if hes Sometimes the smallest gestures can say everything, and the simple touch of someones hand can be a subtle, yet highly effective, way of showing interest. Does he wants to get together with you? It is quite embarrassing sometimes when he asks me what I have completed in front of my boss and then he reply's that'S all you've done, then states that I haven't gotten very far. When a girl or guy is into you, you'll know it. Which ability is most related to insanity: Wisdom, Charisma, Constitution, or Intelligence? Understanding this is crucial for providing you any kind of advise. The good news is that when you meet someone you click with, all of that drama fades away, and you're left with the basics behaviors that have reigned true regardless of time and technology. If you say that you are busy and he asks what you are doing again coming up with another lie will be difficult. Here are 11 different ways on how to respond to what are you doing that can work in any run-in situation: If someone thinks youre doing something wrong, the way in which you respond is very crucial to deescalating the situation. You might not realize it, but filling you in on even the mundane things thats significant, Wood previously told Elite Daily. Plus, if his feelings are starting to run deep, then hell realize that youre not ready for anything serious. Its often normal for dudes to want to be around their new lady as much as possible in the first few days of dating. Maybe he goes out of his way to walk through your department so he's got a chance to talk to you. Maybe hes just still working up the courage to do so, and in the meantime, he tries to make conversation. Someone who is really into you will not keep you waiting too long, Pricilla Martinez, online life coach at Blush previously told Elite Daily. Panic. He wont stop asking me what Im doing.. Here are 11 ways how to respond to what are you doing when your crush/partner asks: 25 of the Best Responses When Someone Says Whats Up. First, a lesson on abbreviations. He Always Want to Be in Touch With You, 3. When he plans a date with you, youll notice that he will usually choose venues where talking with one another is easy. Heres a link to the excellent video again. He might have asked you what youre doing because he doesnt want a girlfriend who will get restless and want to be with him all the time. Hell catch on. He will often send texts asking about your day. Reality. He is actually putting in an effort to see what it is you like! By knowing how to respond properly, the game can go smoothly, and it wont end quickly because you made a bad move, or in this case, you said something wrong. In my experience, there are at least six reasons why someone asks an inappropriate question. You may need clarification on his intentions so that you can decide whether or not this is going anywhere. If they never stand you up, arent late, and dont make plans with you as a last resort, they are treating you as you deserve to be treated. You wonder if he is going to take you out on a date. Below we have listed some of the other telltale signs that he is falling for you . "We could go together" is the giveaway here. The guy is trying to make a good impression that he cares about you. 4. Sometimes its not the right time to respond to someone or to give a relationship a chance. Its better to be honest and to let him know that youve been upset about his actions rather than just being nice and keeping it a secret. If youve just met a guy and hes already asking about your plans There is a really good chance that the guy youre talking to has some really fun plans tonight, like seeing a baseball game or going to a concert and hed love to brag about it. 2. By doing all this, he is trying to convey that you are someone very special to him. Its better to communicate this way than to get too emotional and end up in a relationship that you didnt want. This way you can also test if whatever youre doing is working and get a better understanding of his feelings towards you. Theyre putting in the effort to connect on a deeper level. Another tell till sign that he likes you is when he remembers mostly all the conversations you had with him. Eventually, he'll turn his attentions elsewhere or else it won't be a problem for you. but going days on end with no reply doesnt mean hes just caught up at work. Your email address will not be published. Verizon is going to charge you extra because those vibes are so fucking heavy they just sent you over your data limit. Hes the only male in his group of friends. Its okay to feel flattered by the gesture because it means that he can talk to you about anything. If he says that, he's basically asking you on a date, but if you seem uneasy, he can always back peddle. He is doing it because he wants to be a part of your life. https://today.yougov.com/topics/politics/survey-results/daily/2019/01/23/8102f/3. This might be a red flag if it seems like he is trying to keep you around because he wants something in return. WebIf he asks then he is a control freak. Relatedly, when someone truly cares about you, they dont mind making time to fit your needs and are ready to sacrifice [their] feelings, time, situation without expectation for anything in return," as relationship consultant Andrea Adams-Miller told Bustle. Notice how it's concise and to the point, and there are no awkward, fumbling moments because there are no undertones here. Follow Frank on .css-tjvzc4{-webkit-text-decoration:none;text-decoration:none;text-decoration-thickness:0.0625rem;text-decoration-color:inherit;text-underline-offset:0.25rem;color:inherit;-webkit-transition:all 0.3s ease-in-out;transition:all 0.3s ease-in-out;border-bottom:thin solid #6F6F6F;}.css-tjvzc4:hover{color:#595959;text-decoration-color:border-link-body-hover;}Twitter. It's hard to ignore someone when they are standing behind you. When a guy doesnt make plans to meet you, when he doesnt put any effort in dressing up for you, when your happiness is not his priority, it shows that he is not looking for a long term relationship with you. Asking someone you have a crush on (but they don't know it): "Hey, so, uh this is kind of weird, but well, actually it isn't weird, I just [awkward laughter] my friends gave me a plus-one to this wedding and I was hoping you'd want to go with me? If you want to tell him that you are busy, have an answer thought up, but you should take a chance and see what he is up to. Hell think that his ignoring has worked. #1 You can say Yes, Im fine, thanks, even if youre not OK, and be done with it. A conversation is somewhat like chess, and youll know how to respond based on the persons gesture or what he/she says. He used abusive language towards her calling her fat, freak and weirdo and said she had the mentality of a five-year-old, she said. When a guy texts you to ask what you are doing, It may make you feel confused about what he means. There are actually tons of things he could mean with that question, but here are 11 reasons he asks you what you are doing tonight: The first reason a guy will ask you this question is to figure out whether or not youre available tonight. But, at the same time, he wants to become an important part of your life as well. Still a good answer. If you notice hes trying too hard, it might be a sign that he just needs some reassurance that youre interested before asking for a date. Because you are so new to the dating game, you dont know all the dating rules yet. In budding relationships, sometimes even the small gestures can mean a lot. So if youre ready to take that plunge and reach new heights in your relationship, make sure to check out relationship expert James Bauers invaluable advice. Two short examples: 1. It's fine to answer with a caveat like that in your last paragraph but the first two paragraphs don't really belong in an answer. What do you say when your crush asks you what's up? I write about sex-having. He might need the help, and who is a better wingman for you than you? If you don't want to chat during work hours, then don't. A guy asks what you are doing because they want to maintain regular contact with you. Maybe hes planning to ask you out, or he simply wanted to know, either way, hes checking to make sure youre free. It might seem like he doesnt talk that much, but in reality, youre constantly on his mind. That is one of the best traits any anybody. And the best way to do so is by watching this free video by James Bauer. Can I general this code to draw a regular polyhedron? Take a breath. If you dont feel comfortable with the way he touches you, you should let him know about it. Breathe, calm down, and clear your head to formulate the perfect answer. Hell work hard to impress you and make you happy. Tell him it's none of his business, then pick up your phone and make a call to somebody else while he's still standing there. I touched on the hero instinct earlier its the perfect remedy for the situation youre facing. If he hears you want to go see a movie, he might let you know he wants to go too. 7. Maybe he is asking because he is thinking about you, because he cares about you, because he is curious what you are doing during your "Being important in someones life means meeting the other people in their life and forming connections with them," Reardon said. He really loves you and appreciates your smile. Its better to be honest with a guy you like than to let him figure out that hes not being real. The best solution is direct discussion, saying the same thing that op says in their question. The best answers are voted up and rise to the top, Not the answer you're looking for? Its brutal out here. According to what you said, the guy is doing it just in front of your boss. He might ask so he can plan a date with you later on, or because he wants to hang out with you but doesnt know what kind of things you enjoy doing. On the other, if you do like them, the whole thing can be grueling. He knows that if he asks you out on a date, hell risk getting rejected and then have to deal with the emotions of rejection. Prepare yourselves, because you are going to hear this a lot when you start dating. When he texts you what are you doing, it may be because he wants to hook up with you. Did this guy move away and this is the first time he is contacting you in a year? So to save you from falling into his trap, here are several signs that indicate he is a player and wants to date as many girls as possible. Here are a few things you can do if a guy keeps asking what you are doing: - Ignore him. If he's asking you to an event and it takes longer than half a second to get the question out, he likes you. for some reason when a man thats interested in me continues to ask me this it makes my blood boil. We all have varying opinions on relationship advice, but its all there on the Internet. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. Most of the time, guys ask you what you are doing because they are bored. "They'll respect your decisions and your boundaries," Scharf says. So, how can you trigger your mans hero instinct? From your description he looks almost cartoonishly inadequate, just like, by the way, does your boss. And that can be a polite way of saying Hey, Im into you, but I dont want to scare you off.. We understand that many thoughts are filling your head at this moment, but heres how to respond. Dont wait. I mentioned this fascinating concept earlier: the hero instinct. When dating, its highly essential to spend as much time as you can with your partner. If they are interested in you, theyll be curious about you because theyre trying to figure you out, Safran said. Stack Exchange network consists of 181 Q&A communities including Stack Overflow, the largest, most trusted online community for developers to learn, share their knowledge, and build their careers. Have you wondered why hes asking you what you are up to every day, even though its obvious that youre just sitting at home? He is Always Trying to Leave a Good Impression on You, 8. When someone is into you, they will actively keep in contact with you as much as possible, according to Stefanie Safran, a dating expert and matchmaker at Stef and the City. The defendant told her his fists were his secret weapon. Trust me, hearing those questions all day long can be annoying, but if his questions are coming off as too clingy and needy, it might be because he needs some affection. 9. Hold up one hand in his direction in a stopping motion and shake your head "no", say "I am busy right now, please come back later". So, the next time it happens, talk directly to your boss (or take him in a meeting room for a if(typeof ez_ad_units != 'undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[250,250],'sweetiebomb_com-medrectangle-4','ezslot_9',106,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-sweetiebomb_com-medrectangle-4-0');This is an appropriate thing to say to him. Most of the time, it means that he wants to get together with you. It might be awkward if he keeps asking you what youre doing all the time, but try to keep it casual and simple. Two short examples: 1. Which is fine, I guess, but not the way he does it. He has made time in his schedule to see if the two of you can hang out. Freelance writer specializing in holistic health, wellness, and psychology. If you havent heard of Relationship Hero before, its a site where highly trained relationship coaches help people through complicated and difficult love situations. The next time he comes by (presumably in an hour or less). Hed tell you that hes the kind of guy who doesnt take no for an answer. So, the next time it happens, talk directly to your boss (or take him in a meeting room for a concise 1:1 meeting): The guy who just went to asking me what I am doing is bothering me every hour and I just can't deal with it anymore. Below are a few possible reasons why a guy keeps asking you what you are doing. Sweetie Bomb (SB) is a sophisticatedly witty and opinionated lifestyle blog for women from women seeking organic commentary on various womens issues in the digital space. Life is too short to waste your time on someone who's simply not interested. If you feel like things arent working out and that you need a break from him, then just let him down gently. Girls are not the only ones who need to vent. So if you want to give your man what he truly wants from you, make sure to check out James Bauers excellent video. He is curious about you because he is trying to know more about you and figure you out. Even though its not always easy, you can still be nice, understanding, and honest with someone who likes you. My phone just chimed. A guy asks what you are doing because they want to maintain regular contact with you. Its a hint that he wants to go the extra mile. In it, he reveals the exact texts and phrases you can use straight away. Hes asking for a date to see if he should pursue things with you. What To Do When Your Husband Avoids Conflict At All Costs? Its a common tactic guys use just in case they want to be around you without being too forward about it. The gender gap in pay has remained relatively stable in the United States over the past 20 years or so. He might have asked you politely because he doesnt want to come off as rude. Meeting his parents is normal. All Rights Reserved. Don't. Or he is just curious to know what you are doing right now. How exactly this looks like? Checks and balances in a 3 branch market economy. By feeling compelled to reply to him you are enabling his activities. Maybe he wanted to hang out with you, but he doesnt want to scare you away. Hes not just trying to be polite and caring, it might be a sign that hes a bit of a player and is interested in dating as many girls as possible. But be careful when youre using reverse psychology to test his feelings because he might think that youre already into him and then things could become awkward later on. Dont be so upfront and just try to give him a playful response. When a guy is into you, he will be fascinated by every aspect of your life. What does "up to" mean in "is first up to launch"? How to respond when a guy keeps asking what you are doing? It means that youre becoming a priority to them, as Jane Reardon, a licensed therapist and founder of RxBreakup app, told Bustle. By simply touching your hand in a light way, he may be trying to convey that he has strong feelings for you. If you don't want to talk to We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites. If you He could be asking because he wants to see if youre free tonight. He hates yoga, but he will happily tag along with you at the yoga class. When people start connecting, maybe they're not interested in some of the same things, so one of the things I tell clients is that being flexible in terms of what you like will go a long way in showing your interest or commitment, Safran says. Theyre asking you if you are free because they are bored. Whether you like this approach or not is up to you, after all, women like it when a man takes some initiative, but it could also just be a very sweet way of showing his shyness. 9 Signs He's Trying to Figure Out if You're Into Him, 5 Homemade Lube Options to Try in a Pinch, Your Privacy Choices: Opt Out of Sale/Targeted Ads. 1- Figure out his intentions: The first thing to do in this situation is to first figure out this guys Hes less inclined to choose places with loud music and/or a place where its difficult to have a conversation. Or maybe he wants to hang out with you, but hes just not sure if he can ask you out on a date. Heres how you respond Do you want to do something? Not that there's anything wrong with that. To help you differentiate between what's real and what's not, heres a list of 10 expert-backed telltale signs that someone is into you. Here are 12 things it means when a guy keeps asking what you are doing. I'll foot the bill, don't worry about a gift or anything. Whether they're shy, lack confidence, or are afraid to make things weird if you don't feel the same way, they send out vibes instead and hope you'll pick up on them. He will take you to parks or cafes, where there is less distraction. Here are 11 ways on how to respond to what are you doing in either of these scenarios: How to Respond to How Are You in a Smart Way? (Since my boss is there) The problem is i do not want to make it seem like i am not sociable, and don't want my boss to get mad since he comes in and talks. On whose turn does the fright from a terror dive end? Can I use my Coinbase address to receive bitcoin? WYD translates to What (are) You Doing?. "then he reply's that'S all you've done, then states that I haven't gotten very far" -> "Yeah, there's this guy who keeps bothering me every hour that's really distracting me from my work". If he reacts this way, he obviously likes you. Maybe this guy is just bored, but being firmly postponed several times will make him go away (or find another coworker to bother). There are still many old-fashioned men who believe in being polite to women and treating them with respect, so asking you what you are up to can be a common sign of politeness.